My best friend in 2nd grade was this kid named Morris Washington. I’ll never forget it because in 2nd grade, I started at a new school where I knew no one. After a while, Morris wasn’t my only friend anymore and I don’t even know where he is nowadays. You know why I’m okay with the fact that Morris is probably off somewhere living a completely different life? Well, because I understand that sometimes people are in our lives for particular reasons and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. There is something very valuable about happy endings and I promise it’s got nothing to do with shady massage parlors.
I got a bone to pick with our elders. Growing up, no one ever taught us how to successfully transition out of relationships. I believe we’ve been given a false ideology that every relationship we make is a lifelong one. Somewhere in the past, people started deeming it ‘bad’ when people grow apart and it’s affecting this generation in a very serious way. We don’t know how to let go. We think that growing apart turns a friend into a rival. Allow me to explain.
Siblings and parents are the type of relationships that are life-long. Heck, even a best friend might stick around for a little while. But what we fail to realize is that relationships have meaning and certain purposes for our lives. When we don’t allow for healthy transition to take place, a seasonal relationship can end in what looks and feels like a bad break-up.
We have to start accepting the fact that we aren’t gonna do life in close proximity with the same people for our entire lives. If that were the case, we would never grow. Moreover, we would never be able to appreciate the plans and purposes for the wonderful people we encounter.
I’ll never know why I’ve parted ways with some people but what I do know is that when I really needed support and love, those people were there. Maybe that’s what relationships and friendships are about. Maybe it’s about enjoying one another for whatever amount of time we’re supposed to be in each others’ lives and when that time is up, we can recognize that it was all worth it. Not all endings have to be bad.
I’m not saying you should go and delete half your contact list. I’m just saying that people, seasons, times, relationships, passions, interests, purposes… they all change at some point. Is that really such a bad thing?
In the Bible, this man named Abraham was really close with his nephew named Lot. Both men had huge camps, filled with people that were their “ride or dies”. After a while, they realized that they were both growing so much in their own circles that it was becoming harder and harder for them to coexist so closely. You know what they did? They agreed that it was best for them to split up. And in the VERY NEXT CHAPTER… Lot got into it with some folks from the other side of town. You know who came and rescued him?
His uncle, Abraham.
Because they realized that love goes beyond distance and time.
It’s okay to be close for just a little while.
It’s okay to outgrow some people.
If the relationship is good, welcome the transition with a happy ending.
(not like that, you big ol’ nasty…)
Morris Washington. If you’re reading this, bro, thank you for making the new kid feel like he fit right in. I don’t know what you’ve made of your life but I’m super glad you were a friend when our paths crossed.